Giggles the High Schooler

Dear Giggles, 

As you started off your high school career a mere 10 days ago, I have nary a photo.  I feel like I have failed you just because I haven't taken your photograph.  I think I was just so overwhelmed with you starting HIGH SCHOOL, that my brain turned to mush and I had to focus on other things to keep my brain from imploding.

I know in the grander scheme of things, not having your photo from your very first day of your freshman year isn't going to send you into years of therapy. In fact when I mentioned that I felt that I had wronged you in this simple fashion, forgetting a tradition that I even did while we were homeschooling, you just shrugged.  When I probed you further you asked me, "Why would I remind you mom.  Like I want to pose outside way to early in the morning for a photo."  

Ahhh, the mind of the teenager.  I remember that well.  Being flippant and not really caring about those 'trival' things that my mother cared about.  

I just can't wrap my mind around how much of a young woman you have become, how responsible you are, the things you do so that you can do the things you love.  Maybe I don't say it enough, but I am really proud of you.  You just have no idea.  

And truthfully, I am proud of me too.  The one remark I get more often than not when introducing you people, or them learning of you is that I am not old enough to have a daughter who is nearing closer to 15 each and every day.  In fact, this summer was the first summer I was ever asked if you were my biological child.  Not once, but TWICE!

I had no clue what I was doing when I decided over 15 years ago that the only logical place for you was with me and no where else.  I know that you hate that sometimes we can be strict & we have odd rules, but look at you-I think the odd rules have worked out to your favor. 

I am not afraid to send you out into the world-sure I stagger when you ask me simple questions about hanging out with people or fret over the fact that soon enough you will have friends that drive and you will want to get in your said friend's cars and ride around, but I trust you.  I know that you know that every action that you have has consequences.  And sometimes those consequences will be with you for the rest of your life.  

Not that I ever think of you as a consequence, dear girl.  And when people ask if I had to do it all over again, would I wait longer to have you?  My reply is this....

"Would it be nice to have been older with more of a clue, sure. But if I had waited I would never have her.  My sweet Alexis"

I love you honey, even if I don't have a photo to share of your first day.  We'll get one next week to celebrate you 2 week mark in high school and I will see all that confidence in you. The confidence that will carry me through the next four years.  I know you won't make all the right choices, but I know that you will do what is right in the end.  

Love, Mom